iLondon
by Riz-I
Summary: “The ‘Idiots Guide To London’ says if we go through there, we’ll get ‘mugged’.” “You mean... they’ll throw mugs at us?” “I think so.” Because eloping to London with a brain surgeon as his best man was never going to work. Collab with Colored-Chrome
1. iFly

**[iLondon]  
[Riz-I & Colored-Chrome]  
[Chapter One: iFly]  
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A/N: Author's note is mine this time, you'll hear from C-C in the next one ;) This collaboration's actually been in the making since August. But it _finally _got finished last night. Yeah. Epic fail and whatnot. Disclaimdisclaimdisclaim. **

**Enjoy and all that jazz.**

**And reviews are loved :)  
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From: **narutouzumaki(at)uzumakipaint(dot)org

**To: **sasuke(dot)uchiha(at)leafhospitals(dot)org

**Subject: **Ya-bu-se-YO! (**09:23**)

Teme,

You have the honour of being invited to the wedding of Naruto Uzumaki and Hinata Hyuuga.

Tell no one.

Except Sakura. And possibly Kakashi- actually; don't tell Kakashi. He'll get drunk and ruin everything. And anyways, drunk Kakashi= serial rapist. I don't need him _raping _my wife (to be!)

Naruto

**

* * *

From: **sasuke(dot)uchiha(at)leafhospitals(dot)org

**To: **narutouzumaki(at)uzumakipaint(dot)org

**Subject: **You don't even deserve a subject line, you IDIOT (**10:13**)

Uzumaki,

You stupid, idiot, moron, dobe!

You invite me to a wedding and don't even tell me when or where.

And _why _shouldn't I tell anyone? Why would Kakashi not be invited? He could get as drunk as he wants- Neji would gouge his eyeballs out with a _spoon_ if he tried it on with Hinata.

Sasuke

**

* * *

From: **narutouzumaki(at)uzumakipaint(dot)org

**To: **sasuke(dot)uchiha(at)leafhospitals(dot)org

**Subject: **Everyone deserves a subject. Or it could be a VIRUSSSSSS. (**10:18**)

**When: **Tomorrow night

**Where: **London

And Neji won't actually _be _there.

See, I _tried _asking the Hyuugas for Hinata's hand in marriage. I did _everything _Sakura and Hinata told me to do. I took my shoes off when I went in (I even wore socks without holes in them), I ate everything properly and didn't even stare at all the _weird _statues all over the place. Anyway, when I asked whether I could marry Hinata- everything went _silent _(Well- being the HYUUGA house, everything was silent anyway, it just went even MORE silent) and then her dad pretty much had a hernia while Neji left the room and came back with a load of kitchen knives-

Which he threw at me as I grabbed Hinata and ran out of the house…

So me and Hinata have decided to run away to London to get married. *Smileyface*

Well… I decided. Hinata was too busy making sure Neji hadn't attached a bomb to my car.

Sakura has your tickets. Meet us at JFK Airport today at 5pm!! Plane leaves at 7.

Naruto

* * *

"Ohayo!"

"What have I told you about answering the phone in foreign languages!"

"Oh. It's you."

"Who else would it be?!"

"My fiancée?"

"Do I _sound _like a woman to you?!"

"Hmm. Best not answer that. And anyway, even if you were, you'd be a lesbian and you'd _still _be married to Sakura. You two are just-"

"If you say another word, _I'll _gouge _your _eyes out with a spoon."

"As long as you do it at 5pm at JFK Airport."

"I can't go you idiot. I'm the world's top neurosurgeon- I can't just _leave_."

"For someone who _fondles _brains all day you sure do-"

"I do _not fondle _brains all day!"

"Whatever. You don't really seem to have one. I rang the Hospital pretending to be your dad and said that due to 'certain circumstances too sensitive to be disclosed' you'd be withdrawing your services for a few days. SEE-YOU-AT-5-SAKURA-HAS-THE- TICKETS-DON'T- FORGET-BYE!"

He said the last few exclamations rapidly in one breath before slamming his phone shut.

* * *

Sasuke ran his hands through his hair and picked up his mobile.

_**You have reached Sasuke and Sakura Uchiha. Leave a message. Unless you're Karin. In which case we will have you arrested. **_

_**-BEEP-**_

_Sakura. Remember all the stupid things Naruto did when we were in High School? And in College? And… well. All his life? In classic DOBE fashion, he's decided to get married in London. Tomorrow… Get packing. We've got to be at the airport by 5. Wait a minute. Why am I telling you this? The asshole tells me you already have the tickets. Anyway. I'll see you at five. Love you._

_**-BEEP-**_

**

* * *

NEW JERSEY, AMERICA- ELEVEN: FIFTY NINE (AM)**

Tenten yawned as she jammed the key into the lock on the front door of her (penthouse) apartment. DJ-ing was _seriously _a lot harder than it looked. Especially when it was an all-night event. She pushed the door open and scooped up the bundle of letters on the floor. She began sifting through them.

"Bill. Bill. Junk. Bill. Junk. Junk. Junk. Oooh- hand written."

She flipped the envelope over and noticed the Hyuuga seal on the back. It hadn't been opened before… She quickly slid her finger in and shwipped it open.

Out fell a letter with the anal-retentive folding only a Hyuuga was capable of. And a ticket.

From JFK to Heathrow.

At 7pm.

_Today_.

Dropping the rest of the post to floor, Tenten hurriedly unfolded the letter and began to read.

_

* * *

Dearest Tenten,_

_I am terribly sorry to suddenly burden you with this- but I am afraid matters are no longer within my control. Circumstances have necessitated my elopement with Naruto Uzumaki to London. _

_We wish for the ceremony to proceed as soon as possible in the hopes that my family will eventually grow to accept him. Unfortunately, the Hyuuga Household is rather- selective, on matters such as matrimony._

_As you are and have always been a dear acquaintance of mine and my closest female companion, I wish for you to be present as my Maid-of-Honour. _

_I understand if life and circumstances require you to remain state-side and encumber your ability to attend the wedding, however, it would be a great honour and privilege to have you attend. _

_I have enclosed a ticket for the plane. You need only bring clothes for today and tomorrow. _

_All other expenses shall, of course, be paid by me._

_Yours sincerely,_

_Hinata_

* * *

Tenten laughed. "This is such a Hinata type thing to do." She pulled out her phone (a pink Cyon Lollipop- she went to Korea a few months ago and getting one of those phones was _necessary_) and her fingers flew across the keys as she tapped out a text.

**Tenten: **Hinataaaaa!!! 'sup? On d way. Will meet u at airprt 4 arnd 5-ish? Dats cool reet?

**Hinata: **Oh, it's so wonderful you can come!!

**Tenten: **Hwz d Best Man? Hottttt as a fajita me hopeees.

**Hinata: **I'm so sorry. Naruto chose the best man. He is, as you so poetically put it 'hot as a fajita'- but he's also happily married. His wife's been in love with him since Kindergarten. He's been in denial almost as long- until she almost married some weird guy who had bushy eyebrows. Then Sasuke beat him to a pulp and proposed to Sakura on the spot.

**Tenten: **Kindergarten? Nowdats wot I call COMMITMNT!!

**Hinata: **Please stop typing like a pre-schooler. You're 25 now, Tenten!

**Tenten: **Hw mny tyms do I gta tel ya? I is a DEEE-JAY!! Ths is how we rolllll.

**Hinata: **I'll see you at 5.

**Tenten: ** Fyn, be tht way.

**

* * *

HAMILTON VETERINARY CLINIC, CAMDEN, LONDON, ENGLAND- EIGHT: FORTY SIX (PM)**

"I'm sorry, we're closed for the day."

"There must be something you can-"

"I'm sorry. All the vets are finished for today."

"No, you don't understand. I will _pay _for _somebody _to see my dog _right now_. He's been stabbed in the eye."

"I'm sorry-"

"What the _hell _is all this noise?"

Ino looked up. "Are you the vet?"

"Yes."

"_Look at my dog_."

Sai glanced over at the woman standing in front of him. From the way she was dressed, he could immediately tell she was unemployed.

Not in a 'tacky-old-stinky-clothes-alcoholic-and-lives-in-a-shoebox' kind of unemployed. She was the _other _kind of unemployed. The 'married-into-money/ born-with-money-so-doesn't-_need_-to-work' kind of unemployed.

And he would almost (almost) bet his job that her 'dog' was actually a rat with fur stored carefully away in her gigantic handbag. And that it had stabbed itself in the eye with her nail file. But he had sworn to help everybody and anybody… "Take it out then." He sighed, holding out his hands.

"Huh? Take what out of what?" Sai looked as the woman pulled out a large mongrel from behind her, a mongrel with a kitchen fork lodged in its left eye… "I think you'd better follow me."

**

* * *

JFK AIRPORT, NEW YORK, AMERICA- SIX: TWENTY FIVE (PM)**

**Hinata: **Tenten… WHERE ARE YOU?! I've already rung and told Neji that I'm leaving and that there's nothing he or anybody can do to stop me. YOU NEED TO BE HERE OR HE WILL HUNT YOU DOWN AND KILL YOU!! WE ARE ON THE PLANE!! IT LEAVES IN LESS THAN TEN MINUTES!!!

**Tenten: **Hinata- NO NEED 2 SHOUT BOUT IT!! ;L Srry bbz. Looks lyk I gta catch the nxt plane. Traffic n all dat. Ok. It's ya weddin, so I wnt lie 2 u. I fel asleep n wen I woke up it wer already 6:00. I'll meet ya at d hotel. Dorchester, ryt? N dnt wrry bout Neji. I remmba him frm wen we wer kids.

**Hinata: **You should know, Neji hasn't got-

_**

* * *

We now request that all passengers please turn off all electronic devices and fasten your seatbelts. After the customary checks for security, we will be taking off in a few minutes. Thank you for flying Delta Airlines and we hope you enjoy your flight.**_

**

* * *

Tenten: **NEJI HSNT GOT WHAAATTTT?!

**Orange Customer Services: **Your message could not be delivered. Sorry for any inconvenience caused.

**

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HYUUGA MAIN HOUSE, UPPER EAST SIDE, NEW YORK, AMERICA- SEVEN: OH THREE (PM)**

_**Father,**_

_**I am leaving for London to stop your niece making the **_**most ridiculous **_**mistake of her life**_**.**

_**I shall be back as soon as possible.**_

_**Neji.**_

* * *

"Hello, Lee?"

"Yes Sir, Neji-Sir?"

"Don't _call _me that. I need you to cancel _all flights _leaving JFK Airport to London, Heathrow."

"I'm sorry sir, Neji-sir. One flight is just about to depart. I can cancel all others, however."

Neji grits his teeth. "_There's no need._ Just- book me a ticket on the _next _flight to London."

"SIR NEJI-SIR!!"

"Stop _calling _me that!"

"Yes Sir Neji-"

Neji hung up.

He pulled on his black leather jacket and then grabbed a scarf which he wound around his neck as he opened the door and stepped outside. He slid into his Bugatti Veyron and started the engine. "Right. Airport."

**

* * *

DEPARTURES LOUNGE, JFK AIRPORT, AMERICA- EIGHT: EIGHTEEN (PM)**

Neji took a seat in the Departures Lounge, and began drumming his fingers on the armrest in irritation.

After he'd been doing this for God only knows how long, a pale, slender hand with contrastingly rough palms clamped down on his.

He looked up to glare at the person who was _touching _him. "I'm hung over, you know," she explained.

"That's wonderful. But not an excuse for _touching _me."

"You're _giving me _a headache."

"I'm sorry." Neji turned to face her properly. "But by definition of 'hung over' I assume you already _had _a headache."

The girl rolled her eyes. "Smart ass. You're _making_ it _worse_."

"Maybe it wouldn't hurt so much if your hair wasn't so tightly wrapped in those stupid cinnamon buns."

"What does my _hair _have to do with anything?"

"It accentuates your infinite stupid."

"It's infinite _stupidity_. Stupid."

Neji sighed and turned away from her. She tapped him hardly on the shoulder. "Oy! You! _Look_!"

Neji turned and clamped a hand over her mouth. "You're making a scene you stupid girl."

"I'm not a _girl_! And I had something really important to tell you."

"What?"

"Screw you." And then she stood up and walked away to a seat on the other side of the Lounge.

_**

* * *

Business and First Class Passengers are requested to please make your way to the plane entrance for boarding. Please have your Passport and Ticket ready for examination. Please remember that families traveling with children are to board first.**_

* * *

Tenten watched the arrogant jerk stand up at the announcement and begin making his way to board. As he passed her, she stuck her tongue out at him and then withdrew it to yell "Jerk!" after him.

He didn't even turn around. He was probably accustomed to it.

About fifteen minutes later, she and her fellow Economy Class passengers began to make their way onto the plane.

Just as she was about to take her seat, a stunningly pretty blonde air hostess tapped her on the shoulder. "Excuse me, ma'am. You've been upgraded to First Class. Please follow me." Dazed, Tenten followed, wondering what the _catch _was. As the hostess, with a name badge declaring that her name was Anko, pointed to her new seat and Tenten saw the person she would be spending the next couple of hours of her life sitting beside… she found it.

**

* * *

HAMILTON VETERINARY CLINIC, CAMDEN, LONDON, ENGLAND- FIVE: FORTY TWO (PM)**

"Will Muttley be okay?"

"Muttley?"

"You know- from Dastardly and Muttley? I kind of like to think of myself as Dastardly and Muttley here is my canine partner in crime."

Sai stared at the blonde woman in front of him, kissing her mongrel of a dog who now had an eye patch and was still groggy from the effects of anaesthesia.

"Would you like to tell me why there was a fork in… _Muttley's _eye?"

She stopped stroking her dog and looked up at Sai, tears in her eyes. "I don't know. That's just how I found him."

"You _found _him?"

"Yeah." She stood up from her kneeling position next to the dog. "I was walking to the British Library and he was just shivering under that little brick awning bit as you go in from the side that's next to King's Cross."

"Oh."

"Is that really all you can say? You're a _vet_. You're supposed to be more emotional."

"Huh?"

Ino groaned and rolled her eyes. The vet, Dr Sai, had operated on Muttley for the past- she didn't know- ten or so hours and she could tell, since he managed to save Muttley's sight, that he was a genius at his job.

But he was _useless _at emotions. Ino just _knew_.

Which was a shame.

Because he really was quite hot.

But he was a vet.

Which meant mummy and daddy would never approve…

Ino scowled. _Screw them_.

**

* * *

SOMEWHERE BETWEEN AMERICA AND ENGLAND- MIDNIGHT (AM)**

_Sasuke!_

**Why are you writing me a **_**note**_**? You're sat **_**right next to me.**_

_Yeah, but Hinata's just across the aisle. You really think I want her to hear?_

**What could you possibly say to me that you wouldn't want Hinata to hear?**

_I could say I think you should take Reproductive Organ Enlargement pills, I'm pretty sure _you _wouldn't want Hinata hearing that._

_Sasuke? _

_Please reply._

_I'm sorry._

_Your reproductive organ is a perfect size. Really. In fact, you should perhaps get it reduced. It really is-_

**I'm replying! You can **_**stop**_**.**

_Good boy. Now, do you want to hear what I have to say or not?_

**Go on then…**

_Want to join the Mile High Club?_

**Are you kidding me? Sakura, there are **_**elderly **_**people on this flight.**

_Saaasssukkkeeeeee! You used to have a sense of adventure! What's the worst that could happen? _

**The door could open. Or we could be heard. You might not know this, but you shriek pretty **_**loud**_**.**

_Please?_

**No.**

_Please?_

**NO!**

_No need to shout… Pretty please? _

**No! Don't TOUCH there. SAKURA! NO! Oh… oh God.**

Sasuke grabbed Sakura's hand from where she had put it and pulled her towards the toilet.

* * *

"Hey, Hinata?"

"Mm?"

"Where's teme and Sakura-chi?"

"I don't know. I think maybe they went to get food."

"Oh. They do that pretty frequently, now, don't they?" Naruto looked innocently at Hinata.

She merely looked at him, trying to get it into his head that Sasuke and Sakura were doing _what he himself had asked her to do so many times before. _

You see, Hinata was a firm believer in the whole 'No-Sex-Before-Marriage' thing. That was probably one of the reasons they were rushing it so much...

"Hey, Hinata?"

"Mm?"

"Do you think they sell ramen on this flight?"

"I don't know. I think maybe you should go ask." As Hinata silently wondered to herself whether or not she would be able to sleep at all during the flight, Naruto mentally debated whether he could be bothered to get up and do that.

"Nah… " he decided, "I'm sure they'll bring me back some of whatever they're having."

* * *

Temari got up from her soft seat in the Business class cabin feeling slightly drained. Her seat companion was sleeping (it didn't look like he knew how to do … er-anything else), and the in-flight movies were all tearjerkers.

Why did her life suck?

Being forced to go to London was bad enough. Her manager had been giving her more work than she could handle. She needed to have a word Karin as _soon _as she landed.

Her new collection was making news all over the world because of the apparent "fresh, new , style" that it brought to the models of the most fashionable places on Earth. And thus, she had to go to London for the fashion shows.

As she walked towards the end of the cabin, she heard some very disturbing sounds "_OW! Sasuke, my elbow's digging into the tap!" _and, following that, _"Mm, whatever." _from the restroom in front of the cart full of free cookies and drinks.

As she listened to the soft giggling and gasps coming from the stall, she grinned to herself. He grin was short lived, however, as a sudden bump of the plane made her once again really wish she wasn't on a plane.

You see, Temari was kind-of-sort-of afraid of heights. She wasn't phobic or anything, but, yeah… She didn't like them.

And thus she hated travelling on planes. As far as she was concerned, only an idiot would actually _enjoy _flying higher than the average _bald eagle _chose to fly.

* * *

Having finished her break she went back to her aisle seat and tried to close her eyes and drift off. She had just about drifted off when something _incredibly _heavy dropped onto her shoulder.

"What the _hell_?!" she shrieked.

The man sitting next to her, whose head was the aforementioned 'something _incredibly _heavy' stirred, lifted his head and yawned. Stretching, he turned to blink sleepily at Temari. "You know, if I'd known I'd be sat next to someone this troublesome, I would've flown Economy."

Temari clenched her fists and turned in her seat to properly face him.

"Do you _want _to die?"

* * *

**A/N: Kekeke :) End Chapter One. Review to let us know what you thought. They're always loved. And reviewers will get.. erm... our neverending love and devotion. ^_^**


	2. iArrive

**A/N: Hello peoples. Happy New Year, Merry Christmas, Happy Late Kwanza and Happy 25****th**** of December of whatever you guys celebrate!**

**I fail at wishing all you lovely readers : ))**

* * *

**SOMEWHERE OVER THE ATLANTIC OCEAN- ONE: FOURTEEN (AM)**

**From: **narutouzumaki(at)uzumakipaint(dot)org

**To: **sasuke(dot)uchiha(at)leafhospitals(dot)org

**Subject: **Pipe DOWN**!**

You do realise _everyone_ can hear you? Mostly me and Hinata, due to our unfortunate seating position near the bathroom.

The sounds are too much for poor her virginistic (_Hah! _At least _my _wife-to-be didn't lose her virginity to my _brother_) ears.

So thus my Subject.

Hating You Forever (But you're still my best man, you _teme_)

Naruto

* * *

**From:** sasuke(dot)uchiha(at)leafhospitals(dot)org

**To: **narutouzumaki(at)uzumakipaint(dot)org

**Subject: **You Fail

It's illegal to use these things on the plane.

And we're not _that _loud. hbsdbjdsklfahsfpoafmp

You're interrupting.

Go die.

Sasuke

* * *

"No, not really." Shikamaru replied in response to the question the blonde lady sitting next to him had just posed.

"It wasn't a question." She gritted her teeth at him and he raised an eyebrow. His first girlfriend, Yama-something-really-long, had always found it spectacularly irritating. And when _she _got irritated, something troublesome would _always _happen. And _when_ something troublesome happened, her high-society parents would always get on _his _ass about it.

It was a drag.

"I'm going back to sleep now." He closed his eyes and put his head on the cool window cover.

"You've _bruised _my shoulder. And I have to go out wearing a _one-shoulder dress…_ _Tomorrow_! I demand compensation."

Mentally groaning, Shikamaru blinked his eyes open. There was an easy way to deal with this. "If you beat me at a game of chess, I'll do whatever. If I beat you, you have to shut up for the rest of the flight."

Temari smiled. She might not be specifically good at chess, but she was an extremely proficient strategist. She had 'strategized' her entire marketing campaign and, considering how successful her designer line was doing, it had worked out pretty well.

As Shikamaru began setting up the chess pieces he procured from his bag, Temari put her 'Game-Face' on. The one she used before kicking the ass of any poor fool who tried to grope _her _ass…

Game _on, _Pineapple-Head.

* * *

**STILL SOMEWHERE OVER THE ATLANTIC OCEAN- TWO:THIRTY FOUR (AM)**

"Do you get off on torturing strangers?" Tenten asked the man next to her after several hours of defiant silence.

"What?"

"Don't play stupid. Did you, or did you not, _ask _for me to be seated next to you?"

Neji looked at her. He noted her angry brown eyes, and the messy buns. "You don't know who I am?"

"Of course I do. That's why I'm asking…" she rolled her heavily outlined eyes. "You're that noob-face from the Departure Lounge."

Neji tilted his head as he observed the oblivious woman in front of him. She _honestly _didn't recognise him. Hmm- maybe this could work to his advantage. He cleared his throat and attempted to smile.

Tenten reeled back. "Erm… what are you doing with your face?"

Neji tried to strain the smile further. "I'm smiling…"

"Yeah. You might want to stop that now."

Neji's 'grin' dropped. "You're _impossible_."

"You're a dick."

"I'm trying to be civil. You're not making it _easy_."

Tenten watched as the man ran his hands through his messy, short brown hair. He was astonishingly good-looking, but, as she had learned the hard way due to a certain (_also _brown haired) boy when she was younger- astonishing good looks _always _equalled astonishingly assholish personality.

"You're number-number-something, right? What number was it, again? I think-"

"Tenten." She said in a voice that could have chilled frozen steel.

"Oh."

"How do you even know?"

"I saw your boarding pass."

"Stalker-creep."

"_Listen_!" Neji had never been this frustrated before, "_Stop _insulting me. I haven't _done _anything to you and your constant infantile behaviour is starting to _piss me off_." He fumed silently for a few seconds as he gloated in Tenten's shocked face.

His satisfaction was momentary. Tenten burst out laughing and, to his infinite surprise, _ruffled _his hair. "Hey, Jerk-Man. I like you angry, kind of reminds me of someone I knew a long time ago. Hmm…" she looked thoughtful for a moment. "I don't suppose you know your way around London?"

"Like the back of my hand." Neji lied.

Tenten beamed. "Then, will you help me find my friend's wedding? Apparently she's marrying the absolute foolshe's been in love with since like, forever. She used to _faint _every time he spoke to her- can you believe it?"

'_Marrying? Abulute fool? Faint? Believe it?'_ Neji almost allowed himself to smile for real. _Almost_.

"It would be an honour. Are you sure she wouldn't mind?"

"Of course not! Hinata's a sweetie."

'_Bingo_!'

They returned to silence for the remaining hours of the flight.

* * *

**Good morning passengers, this is your Captain speaking. We will begin our descent in a few minutes. If you require any assistance on navigating your way throughout the airport, a help video is available on your televisions. Please remember to keep all electric devices and seatbelts on. Thank you for flying Delta Airlines!**

* * *

**HAMILTON VETERINARY CLINIC, CAMDEN, LONDON, ENGLAND- FIVE: OH ONE (AM)**

Sai looked at the lady sitting on the floor in front of him. He was drained, but couldn't show it.

Yes. He was incapable of showing emotions.

Apparently he was the opposite of the woman sitting in front of him, who was hugging "Muttley" and crooning over him. She had made him stay up all night.

This could go on no longer.

"Miss. Excuse me."

Ino looked up at the man sitting on the ridiculously comfortable sofa in the lobby. His hair was mussed and he looked incredibly bored… but he _still _hadn't left.

Ino saw this as an opportunity to flirt with the hot vet. She fluttered her eyelashes and bit her lip before saying in a heated voice, "Yes, Doctor?"

"Do you plan on leaving this building within the next twenty-four hours?" For a man that had no feelings, he sure could do sarcasm well.

Ino narrowed her eyes at this. She was no stranger to sarcasm. "Well, _excuse me_, I don't see what _you're _rush is. You blatantly have no social life, and that means no friends, which means no social interaction which instantly means no social gatheri-"

"My friend is getting married tonight."

"You have friends?"

Sai said nothing, just gave Ino an incredulous look.

"What's his name?" asked Ino, purely for the sole purpose of hearing his sexy voice again.

Ino was very good at falling in love… Okay. She'd admit it. Not _love. _She was very good at falling in _lust_.

But seriously.

Who _wouldn't _lust after this guy.

He sure as hell beat all the stuffy aristoBRATS her parents kept trying to hook her up with.

"It's a she, actually. Hinata."

"As in Hinata _Hyuuga?_" Ino was shocked.

"Yes, but how did you kno-?"

"I know her. And her fiancé. My family and Naruto's go way back."

"Naruto? That small-dicked man she's marrying?"

"Whoa. _Small-dicked_? Poor Hinata. She's saved herself for so long… And her husband isn't even well equipped? Poor baby… Hang on- How do _you _know? Are you gay?"

Sai rolled his eyes and scowled at her.

Which, technically, wasn't an answer…

Whatever.

Ino was bent on making Sai hers.

They were both suddenly startled as both their phones simultaneously went off. They both checked them. "Sorry, I have to go." they said, perfectly in sync.

Sai rolled his eyes again. "I suppose it's only customary that I offer you a lift?" He paused to think for a second. "Only if it's in the right direction though."

"Erm… Heathrow Airport?"

Sai looked at her and then back at his phone.

* * *

**Sai-san. We have just arrived at Heathrow Airport. I'm sorry to bother you, but please could you come and collect us now? We're at Terminal 3. Hinata.**

* * *

**LONDON HEATHROW AIRPORT, SIX: FIFTEEN (AM) ARRIVALS**

The group of four people had been waiting at the Luggage Carousel for over an hour and their bags _still _hadn't all come out.

Sakura was not amused.

"Naruto?"

"Yes, Sakura-chan?"

"Who's picking us up?"

It was here that Hinata put in. "My friend Sai is coming to take us to our hotel."

Naruto turned to her. "I thought you asked _me_ to get someone to pick us up!"

Hinata just stared. Honestly, she loved Naruto, but sometimes, she just didn't know what to do with the situations he got them into. His methods were crazy and she had no idea how he'd managed to get out of everything alive so far…

"I already asked Ino to pick us up. You know, Ino Yamanaka."

"Yamanaka?" Sasuke, his hair suspiciously ruffled, rubbed incongruously at the small red bite marks on his neck. "I think I operated on a British guy called Ino_ichi _Yamanaka a while ago. She wouldn't be related to him, would she?"

"Ino's his daughter."

Sasuke just blinked. All he remembered of Inoichi Yamanaka was that he had been some aristocrat from England who had a brain tumour that he didn't want anyone finding out about… and that he'd thrown a huge hissy fit when he found out his long blonde hair would have to be shaved.

Hinata and Naruto had gone off to the side to try and decide whether or not the fact that two people were coming would be a problem or not leaving Sasuke and Sakura alone at the baggage carousel. "I'm just going to the Ladies Room, sweetie." Sakura winked at her husband and then hurried off.

Sasuke rolled his eyes and began waiting for the rest of their luggage. He rolled his eyes at the large orange suitcase which could be no one _but _Naruto's and pulled it off the carousel. "Erm," came an accusatory voice from behind him, "Why are you stealing my luggage?"

Sasuke spun around, irritated. "It's _not _your luggage. And I don't _steal_."

The slightly bored looking man with hair vaguely resembling a pineapple that was with the woman accusing Sasuke simply yawned and pointed at the label on the suitcase. "Temari Subaku. That's her." He pointed at Temari.

"That's right, Chess-Failure. Now pick it up and follow me."

Sasuke watched as the man muttered something that sounded like, "This is such a drag…" and bent down to pick up the suitcase.

He himself had only a small green backpack.

Sasuke made sure to check the label before pulling the next _bright orange _suitcase off.

* * *

**PROPERTY OF NARUTO UZUMAKI! STEAL IT AND YOU DIE… BELIEVE IT!!**

* * *

By the time Sakura had returned, Hinata and Naruto were back and Sasuke was standing surrounded by all the luggage. "You know… considering this was planned _yesterday_, and we're only here for _one night_, wouldn't you say you packed a bit much?" he indicated Sakura's seven suitcases.

She responded by giving him a 'loving' (by which I mean, extremely painful) punch in the arm.

"Teme! Sakura-chii! We've sorted it all out. Me and Hinata will go with whoever out of Ino and Sai arrives first, with all the luggage and whatever, get everything at the hotel sorted and all that. You two will come next."

"Yes. I'm sorry we have to go separately, but it's really the only way we can justify to Ino-chan and Sai calling the both of them here."

"Also, Neji's going to be here soon. It's probably best if I'm not here when that happens…"

"Got it." Sakura smiled. "Now it's just a matter of _one of them _arriving already."

"I don't think that's an issue…" Naruto noticed something through the crowd and his eyebrows shot up into his fringe. "There's Ino… and kick me if I'm wrong but- I think the guy giving her a piggyback ride is Sai."

"Naruto?"

"Yes, teme?"

"Can I kick you anyway?"

"NARUTOOOOOOOOOO! Long time no see!" The pretty blonde woman who was indeed currently on Sai's back grinned and waved wildly. The two arrived at the group and Ino hopped off. "Hey, Hinata. Nice to see you!" she smiled. "I don't know you two but…" he eye fell on the hickeys on Sasuke's neck and both his and Sakura's mussed hair. She winked inconspicuously, "I think we'll get along just fine." She bounded over to Naruto and they launched into stories of 'The Good Old Days'.

"Miss Yamanaka?" Sai's voice sounded choked.

"Mm?"

"I see your ankle has made a miraculous recovery..."


End file.
